The Armed Republic of Fort Ashland is a huge, safe nation, notable for its pith helmet sales, public floggings, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, devout population of 493 million Ashlandians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, moralistic government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Law & Order, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while International Aid and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Asheville. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 14.7%.

The powerhouse Fort Ashlandian economy, worth 49.1 trillion doubloons a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 99,650 doubloons, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 294,114 per year while the poor average 26,551, a ratio of 11.1 to 1.

The question "please would you...?" is usually laden with passive aggression, a firework a day does not in fact keep the doctor away, getting an infected tattoo is considered a rite of passage in Fort Ashland, and economics is a shrinking field. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Fort Ashland's national animal is the dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Fort Ashland is ranked 53,931^st in the world and 666^th in Europe for Most Beautiful Environments, with 668.8 pounds of wildlife per square mile.